The Eve of Two Debacles - Tuesday, November 2, 2004

Tomorrow is a big day for me. It's a day I have been waiting for for quite a while. Both days promise to end in crushing disappointment.

First of all, there's that little election thing. I fully expect George W. Bush to win the election. I think he has the support of most of the "heartland" of America, and I think his hardcore supporters are more organized than their Democratic counterparts. I will vote for John Kerry tomorrow, but New York State is a foregone conclusion anyway and my vote means even less than it did in 2000. I really can't see how any rational human being -- Democrat or Republican -- can feel confident about Bush's record. When I see people in the crowds on shows like Hardball, I think to myself, "Have the last four years been that great for you? How shitty was your 1999 that your 2000-2004 was an improvement?" Ironically, I personally am far better off this year than I was when Clinton was in office, but I don't think 'W' really had anything to do with it.

I understand a lot of what Republicans think and I am very much on board with a lot of their issues. But if you're coming down to leadership, do people really think that when Bush wins (I have a $10 bet that he will, I'm hoping to at least make some money off the deal), he's suddenly going to fix the messes he's created? He's had 3 years of governing and 1 year of campaigning to do it all. Now that he doesn't face the spectre of having to be re-elected, what will his motivation be to make good decisions? I would hate to think that people would vote for Bush for either, a) one divisive issue, like these idiots who vote ONLY on gun control or ONLY on abortion or ONLY on separation of church and state or ONLY gay marriage, or b) blind party loyalty.

I would hate for it to be the latter. In 2000, I gave up my Democratic party affiliation because I didn't feel Al Gore was a strong leader, and I didn't like the direction the party was headed. Ironically, it was George Bush who has strengthened the Democrats and made them more united than ever, and brought the common sense of the party back. I'm even coming back to them this election. But unconditional party loyalty makes no sense to me. Why would you vote for a person you know deep in your heart is not doing the job, and is not in control, and does not have the capacity to deal with real-world issues, just because he wears the elephant or the donkey on his lapel? If a Democrat like Hillary Rodham Clinton runs against a Republican like John McCain in 2008 (and it could happen, couldn't it?), you bet your sweet can I'd be all over McCain's jock in that election. See? It's easy, people!

The fact is, I was right behind Bush after 9/11 and at the onset of the Iraq War, but he has proven over and over again (no matter how many chances and "he's-our-president-let's-stand-behind-him" benefits of the doubt I've given him) that he just is not capable of transcending his myopic view of things. He calls it "resolve," I call it "tunnel vision." I don't think the guy's evil like a lot of people do, but I do think he is in way way way over his head. (And to suggest that somehow Kerry will be soft on terrorists is stupid. Anyone can take any quote out of context and make it sound like another person is soft. And no one takes things out of context better than the hardline Bush supporters this year. No one.)

Now if you don't like Kerry, I can kind of understand that. He comes off as arrogant and wishy-washy. But I have not heard one single compelling argument that suggests he will do a worse job than Bush has already done. Anyone who wants has one day to convince me to vote for Bush. Actually, they've had the last year to do it and no one has been able to. Your boy had his chance to do something and he has not made one significant improvement. Even the Texas Rangers got better after he left. THE TEXAS RANGERS!

I'll say this, if Bush does win, I will get behind him as I would get behind any president because I believe in supporting the country. But if he looks this second chance in the mouth and continues to defy good judgment over the next four years, don't blame me for it.

The other, and far more important quagmire I find myself entering tomorrow, is our baskeball league. We're playing for the Change of Pace, our local watering hole on Grant Blvd in Syracuse. I will be playing. I am actually the captain of our team. How the hell that ever happened is completely beyond me. But one thing is certain about our team; we are going to be crushed. We are likely going to be crushed by every team who faces us. We have had no time to practice, and I have not touched a basketball in nearly 6 months.

Granted, the last time I did was the Pabst Invitational Tournament in my driveway on Memorial Day, where my good friend AJ and I disposed of some haters and perpetrators to advance to the finals. But that was months ago, folks. Today I am as out of shape as I've ever been, fat with Halloween candy and fried foods. I had planned -- nay, vowed -- to start running to get in shape for the games, but then I would get home and look at the inviting warmth of my couch, or be invited to enjoy some delicious alcoholic malt beverage after work, and suddenly, not collapsing on the basketball court didn't seem so important to me. I only have about 24 hours to get in shape. But as motivated as I am, I'm sure I'll be just fine. If I'm not dead tomorrow, I'll make sure I note the results. (Oh Jitter, where are you when we need you???)

Remember me well. In fact, remember me better than I actually was. It's not too hard.